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I was all over the place. Indecisiveness had become the norm for me. One minute I wanted to be an astronaut, the next a painter (not for real, but you get what I’m saying). My indecisiveness coupled with a desire to fulfill my purpose seemed to create one life-changing decision after another for me, probably more frequently than most. It seemed every other month I was contemplating a new career, a location change, businesses to invest in or ideas to get off the ground. I was moving quickly but going in circles. Finally, I got tired of living an emotionally dizzy life. I knew I had a lot to offer the world (I mean that in the most modest way possible). I needed to get serious and stable in my thinking and decisions if I wanted to accomplish anything worth talking about. So I had to pause, go back to the drawing board, re-strategize and figure out how to make my next move my best move–or at least a much better one.
This revelation hasn’t come easy, and it took some time. Actually, much more time than I would have liked; but finally I began to get it together and success followed. First, I had to ask myself some serious questions about what I really wanted out of life. I had to consider if I was making decisions for the short-term or if I actually had long-term goals in mind.
According to the author of an article called “Personal Goal Setting” on Mind Tools, the first step in setting personal goals is to consider what you want to achieve in your lifetime (or at least, by a significant and distant age). Setting these lifetime goals gives you the overall perspective that shapes all other aspects of your decision-making. For me, I had to consider if I would live my life wondering ‘what if’ just because I was making emotional decisions based on a bad month. I had to contemplate if a different decision, possibly one that required more sacrifice, would be the best one to get me to where I needed to be.
In addition to these questions, it was important to figure out my priorities. What really mattered to me? Was it family and the hopes of eventually having my own? Was having a budding social life important? Did I want to eat well and travel often? Or did money matter more than being fulfilled in my career? Would I be okay working in a job that I hated if it provided me enough money to temporarily shop my way to happiness? At the time that I was contemplating this, like divine measure, a friend randomly advised me that my career should line up with my priorities. I began to think.
Because I am such a ‘purpose-seeker’, I had to consider if the decisions I made were in line with what I believed I was supposed to do. So I created both a mission and a vision statement. Your mission statement defines your purpose. It’s what you ultimately want to achieve in your life or career, expressed in a specific, measurable way. Your vision statement represents your core values and how you’ll apply those values to your mission. It’s more emotion-based.
So once I got clear about what I believed my purpose and values were, I saw a lot clearer when it came to making decisions that were aligned with my long-term goals. I launched a business that is steadily generating profit. I got serious about my career as a journalist, even though it meant taking a financial step back. I also created a non-profit organization in hopes of empowering young girls, and all of it fit into my mission and vision for my life. While it has come with a lot of sacrifices, I can handle it better because I have a vision, and I’m living my life based on what matters to me most.
And now, I will share some useful advice by quoting the late, great rapper, Notorious B.I.G.: “Stay far from timid and only make moves when your heart’s in it.” This sums it up. Think about what you want down the line, develop goals and a tentative plan, be patient, and stay focused. Make decisions based on your priorities. It’s helped me make each one of my next moves, much better moves.
