Welcome to our Mommy Mogul column where we cover issues of importance for moms who are launching a new business, working a side gig, or managing work life and home life. Is there a topic you’d like us to address? Send your thoughts to tgarcia@madamenoire.com. And, as always, take to the comments with your feedback.
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Man The New York Times is on a roll with their articles that seem to focus on stay-at-home mothers. Just the other day they were discussing the idea of a “wife bonus” that caught some people off guard. As if we need any more fuel to the “mommy war” fire, here comes a new study that strongly favors working mothers.
First I think it’s important to point out that being a stay-at-home wife is not a “white thing.” Sure I didn’t see many growing up in Baltimore, but as I grew older, my horizon of reality expanded. I actually know quite a few stay-at-home moms of color. Whether they’re military wives, a pastor’s wife, or have too many children to pay for childcare (it does get costly), there are so many reasons why a woman stays at home that go beyond the fanciness you see on The Real Housewives. Just because it’s not the norm in your circle doesn’t mean it can’t exist.
While I do technically “stay at home,” I fall into the work-from-home mom category as I have an home office (it’s not mandatory but does it come in handy), am self-employed and freelance on the side. Like my stay-at-home sisters, I get naive questions and comments from people who don’t understand that women who work from home while taking care of their little ones actually do work.
One thing that I really hate about women is how judgmental we can be. As if we don’t have to deal with inequality, we can oftentimes be our own worst enemy. Sure it’s okay to have an opinion about something but that doesn’t mean you need to put others down in order to make yourself feel right. In fact, that’s pretty childish.
In case you missed it — or didn’t see any social media feuds between moms — a new study reveals children of working mothers tend to have more advantages than stay-at-home moms. Daughters in particular are more likely to be employed, earn higher incomes and even hold positions of power. In the U.S. (the study was conducted in 25 countries), they typically earn 23 more than daughters of stay-at-home moms. It’s worth a mention that the study did not differentiate between the hours a mother worked.
This should hopefully remove some guilt from working mothers who feel they’re missing out. Yes work/life balance is important; you should try to spend as much time with your child as possible. But at least you know your hard work is paying off by providing for your child and, apparently, later in life when they’re ready to start down their own career path.
I can’t say I’m surprised at the positive influence a working mother has on her child. Aside from the financial aspect of being able to provide for them (and saving for their own future), it would seem natural for a child to want to follow their mother’s professional ambition. Given the study focuses on working moms and not the amount of hours, that also ropes in those of us who don’t follow traditional career paths. You don’t need to wear a power suit or have a corner office to be about business.
Regardless of the study, I think a parent’s overall influence and push for excellence are key. While there’s no denying stats, stay-at-home mothers who opt not to enter the workforce are also helping to mold their child’s dreams and ambition. This does raise the question if more should transition into being a work-from-home mom.
What are your thoughts?
